Out of Commission

I was incommunicado last night.  Not because I wanted time alone or needed to zone out. Not because I didn’t want any distractions while I gathered my thoughts. Nope.

I was incommunicado last night because I left my cell phone at work, and longtime readers will know that I no longer own a landline.

Henry and I go into safety mode, covering ourselves with blankets to protect from possible disasters. "Oh, bother," he says.

Without a phone to use in case of emergency, Henry and I do all we can to stay safe, which includes covering ourselves with blankets to protect from possible disasters. “Oh bother,” Henry sighs.

So, I was out of commission. Had I been a contestant on the show, Who Wants to be a Millionaire? I would not have been able to phone my lifeline.

Which is why I immediately went into action.  I sent an e-blast to all my friends alerting them of my unavailability to talk should they have a hankering to do so.

They never do.

I sent an email to all my credit card companies, should they want to call me to discuss a, ahem, late payment or something, and let them know that I’d be unreachable.

I then sent a desperate email to my children. “In case you need me, as I’m sure you will, I beg of you to please email me as my phone was inadvertently left in the office.”

I was certain they’d respond lickety-split and commiserate with my lack of phone. I even took my iPad with me on my walk with Henry, my Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, as I didn’t want to miss their email while I was out and about.

Of course, they didn’t write. Though, a few hours later I did get a short reply from my son. “Okay,” is all he wrote.

Okay?? Didn’t he grasp the seriousness of the situation, and how, should something terrible happen, there’d be no way of notifying me and no way of asking me to bring the bail money? This was a grave matter, indeed!

On the other hand, what if something happened to me?? How would I get word out? What if I fell down the stairs or tripped in the bathtub? And, as I gasped for breath, dragging myself across the room, and digging my nails into the carpet to help pull me along, there’d be no phone to reach for and no 9-1-1 to call and send help!

I suppose I could send out smoke signals through my gas fireplace, but it hasn’t been working of late. I could attach a can of Diet Coke around Henry’s neck and send him off into the dark of night in the hopes he’d bring back help, but Henry would no doubt get distracted and fall in a heap on the grass to take a nap.

Dash it all! When did I become a slave to my cell phone??

So, what was I to do?  Well, I did what any practical person would do in such a case as this. I battened down the hatches, hook, line and sinker.  I got into bed, with a blanket wrapped tightly around me to make sure I’d get into no accidents. Henry, begrudgingly followed suit and curled up beside me. I left all the lights on to ward off burglars. We didn’t budge all night. At least I didn’t. I stayed awake, keeping my eyes open to ensure no funny business would go on while I slept. Meanwhile, Henry fell asleep within minutes and snored the night away.

I did all I could to make sure we survived the night, without needing to call 9-1-1.

The next morning I drove ever so slowly to work, to avoid getting into an accident. Cars wildly honked at me. Someone even cursed and muttered something about holding up traffic, but I didn’t care. Safety first, after all. Life is challenging enough, and even more so without a phone handy.

Finally, I arrived at work and headed to my office. There was my phone, nonchalantly lying on my desk, and I swear it gave me a wink.

And, that was that. Another catastrophe averted. Oh and by the way, in case you’re wondering, The Fish Who Came to Dinner, is alive and well! And, also, still here. Sigh.

Now tell me, how do you manage when you forget your phone?

10 Things You Don’t Know About Me

You may recall (and if you don’t, you have a very short memory), that I have been honored with the Kreativ Blogger Award, thanks to my blogger pal, Isabelle and her blog, As the Actress said to the Bishop.

I’ve already fulfilled the first rule, passing the award on to 10 very cool blogs that are definitely worth reading (See London Actress Picks Me!). So now, it’s on to Rule #2.  A little drumroll, please…

Guam, the little island with the friendliest people.

Here are 10 things I’ve yet to reveal about myself:

1. My favorite color is purple. No, orange. Ok, purple it is.

2. My mother had meningitis while pregnant with me and we almost didn’t make it. Luckily, one of her sisters nursed her back to health, and thus I was born.

3. I once spent a whirlwind week in Guam. Met the governor, was interviewed on the radio and featured in a TV spot. I also made the front page of the local newspaper. Capped off the week by enjoying a typical Chamorro barbecue and sampling the island specialty–Spam. Yum!

4. When I was a kid, my uncle gave my family a dog. Jeffrey lasted with us for two whole weeks. Never having owned a pet, we didn’t know what to do with the poor thing. And so, we gave him back. I still miss him.

5. I just finished listening to my first audio book ever, Ken Follet’s Fall of Giants. It was incredibly engrossing, all 32 hours of it.  I listened while walking my dog and wasn’t sure whether I’d be able to concentrate, but now I’m hooked on audio books. Devil in the White City by Erik Larson is next.

The Mister Softee truck brings back fond memories from my childhood.

6. I’m not a big fan of ice cream. If I buy a pint, it can stay in the freezer for six months to a year. Yet I still have a soft spot in my heart for the Mister Softee and Good Humor Ice Cream trucks of my youth, and the jingles and bells they’d play through the streets of Queens, signaling to us kids that their cold treats were just around the bend.

7. I like to drive fast and have little (none, really) patience for those who don’t. It drives me crazy. No pun intended.

8. For me, it’s Diet Coke all the way. So much so that a couple of years ago, I found myself in Atlanta for a conference and made the trip to Mecca. Which, for me meant visiting the  World of Coca-Cola museum. The two-hour indoctrination included an animated film homage to the soft drink–inside the Happiness Factory Theater–a guided tour through the history and art inspired by Coca-Cola, and an all-you-can-drink sampling of beverages from around the world. My favorite: Pineapple Fanta.  And all this while being surrounded by fellow Coca-Cola die-hard enthusiasts. Only thing missing: Support groups to help us navigate in a world that often favors Pepsi.

9. When I was in sixth grade, my teacher discovered I had an adequate singing voice and recruited me to join the glee club.  As a result, I had dreams of grandeur and making it big on Broadway.  We all know how that turned out.

10. I spent eight years living in Seattle and I totally loved the overcast, rainy weather as well as the long summer days.  Which is why I settled in San Diego. Makes no sense, but who cares? I’m happy!

So thank you, thank you.  I promise I won’t let the Kreativ Blogger award go to my head.