Out of Commission

I was incommunicado last night.  Not because I wanted time alone or needed to zone out. Not because I didn’t want any distractions while I gathered my thoughts. Nope.

I was incommunicado last night because I left my cell phone at work, and longtime readers will know that I no longer own a landline.

Henry and I go into safety mode, covering ourselves with blankets to protect from possible disasters. "Oh, bother," he says.

Without a phone to use in case of emergency, Henry and I do all we can to stay safe, which includes covering ourselves with blankets to protect from possible disasters. “Oh bother,” Henry sighs.

So, I was out of commission. Had I been a contestant on the show, Who Wants to be a Millionaire? I would not have been able to phone my lifeline.

Which is why I immediately went into action.  I sent an e-blast to all my friends alerting them of my unavailability to talk should they have a hankering to do so.

They never do.

I sent an email to all my credit card companies, should they want to call me to discuss a, ahem, late payment or something, and let them know that I’d be unreachable.

I then sent a desperate email to my children. “In case you need me, as I’m sure you will, I beg of you to please email me as my phone was inadvertently left in the office.”

I was certain they’d respond lickety-split and commiserate with my lack of phone. I even took my iPad with me on my walk with Henry, my Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, as I didn’t want to miss their email while I was out and about.

Of course, they didn’t write. Though, a few hours later I did get a short reply from my son. “Okay,” is all he wrote.

Okay?? Didn’t he grasp the seriousness of the situation, and how, should something terrible happen, there’d be no way of notifying me and no way of asking me to bring the bail money? This was a grave matter, indeed!

On the other hand, what if something happened to me?? How would I get word out? What if I fell down the stairs or tripped in the bathtub? And, as I gasped for breath, dragging myself across the room, and digging my nails into the carpet to help pull me along, there’d be no phone to reach for and no 9-1-1 to call and send help!

I suppose I could send out smoke signals through my gas fireplace, but it hasn’t been working of late. I could attach a can of Diet Coke around Henry’s neck and send him off into the dark of night in the hopes he’d bring back help, but Henry would no doubt get distracted and fall in a heap on the grass to take a nap.

Dash it all! When did I become a slave to my cell phone??

So, what was I to do?  Well, I did what any practical person would do in such a case as this. I battened down the hatches, hook, line and sinker.  I got into bed, with a blanket wrapped tightly around me to make sure I’d get into no accidents. Henry, begrudgingly followed suit and curled up beside me. I left all the lights on to ward off burglars. We didn’t budge all night. At least I didn’t. I stayed awake, keeping my eyes open to ensure no funny business would go on while I slept. Meanwhile, Henry fell asleep within minutes and snored the night away.

I did all I could to make sure we survived the night, without needing to call 9-1-1.

The next morning I drove ever so slowly to work, to avoid getting into an accident. Cars wildly honked at me. Someone even cursed and muttered something about holding up traffic, but I didn’t care. Safety first, after all. Life is challenging enough, and even more so without a phone handy.

Finally, I arrived at work and headed to my office. There was my phone, nonchalantly lying on my desk, and I swear it gave me a wink.

And, that was that. Another catastrophe averted. Oh and by the way, in case you’re wondering, The Fish Who Came to Dinner, is alive and well! And, also, still here. Sigh.

Now tell me, how do you manage when you forget your phone?

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28 thoughts on “Out of Commission

  1. Monica,

    Our humans would be lost without this cell phones. You never had to fear because Henry the Royal dog was by your side. We try to tell the humans that we will protect them when their gadgets go missing but they don’t always hear us. Glad you are in commission again.

    -Bella and DiDi

  2. M- you’re a nut. You made me smile. It is true, we get a little too attached to our phones. It’s crazy, but they become an extension of our arms. We can’t function without them, or think we can’t, but we do manage.

    • Thanks, Brenda. Being called a nut is one of the biggest compliments you can pay me, so I appreciate it. Now that I have my phone on my desk as I write this, I feel much better, and safer. 🙂

  3. Rather ironic to read this the morning after awakening from a dream in which I seem to have misplaced (or lost) my cell phone (somewhere on a vacation of sorts in a house with many people). I can still sense that anxiety in my dream, relieved only when I awoke to remember the phone was on my desk. I have a hankering of what initiated the dream (no doubt issues much larger than a misplaced phone). But I did find myself smiling (even laughing) at the ‘slavery’ you so delightfully cast an eye on here. My husband, who does not own a cell phone, would probably find this even more amusing.

  4. You had to have felt positively naked, unconnected and well, not safe. Glad you feel that you’re back in business.
    I think we’re about ready to let go of the landline, but it’s a dilemma. Can my cell phone handle conference calls, faxes and then there’s the security system tied to it–yet no one calls us on the home phone any more. I’ve never left my phone at school, but I have walked out the door in the morning without it–then my family goes crazy because they do keep up with me during the day.

    • Georgette, I am back in business! With my phone at the ready, I feel I can do anything. I can take risks and cross the street without looking both ways (as long as I’m at a crosswalk). You get the picture. 🙂

  5. I am so sorry you left your phone lonely and unattended. How could you? Your phone was likely cursing you for your inattention.

    I am of course giggling at you.

    I leave my phone in the car, every single night so I am not bothered by it. I still have a land line in the house. Very few people have the number and those that do know they can reach me if they need me.

    • Val, if you know anything about me it’s that I love to exaggerate. Which is why my web is so tangled, blurring the line between truth and fiction. Yes, I left my phone. No, it wasn’t that bad. I survived! Glad I could make you giggle. 😉

  6. Such a cute picture of our beloved Henry! He looks to me to be saying “uh oh…here we go again….” 🙂

  7. Just a thought. You know when you call 911 from your cell phone they don’t know where you are? But when you call from a landline the address pops up right away and they can send someone immediately. 🙂
    When I leave my phone inevitably my daughter calls me. Then she calls all my friends and her father (my ex) to see if they know where I’ve gone off to. Then she sends the facebook messages and the emails. You see if you don’t tell them you’re okay you get a much more satisfying response.

    • Lisa, you raise a good point about 911, but I think they can at least trace you to the nearest cell tower. I like your strategy for hearing from the family. A kind of reverse psychology. Very clever!

  8. Fortunately, I’ve never gone that long without my cell phone — I can’t imagine how frustrating that must have felt! It sounds as if you handled it quite well, all things considered — better than most of us would. We’ve all grown so terribly attached to our gadgets! It’s one thing to just chat away on one’s phone — it’s another entirely to NEED your phone in case of an emergency. Glad you survived okay!

  9. Thanks for the chuckle this morning. Isn’t it mind-boggling how dependent we’ve become on our cell phones? As if the whole world might fall apart if we weren’t carrying one? I think it would do us all a world of good if we’d all “accidentally” leave our phones at work for a day. Then we’d remember that we survived (and thrived) forever without them. Of course mine is sitting an inch and a half away from me as I write this, and I’d be in the same panic as you, but …. 🙂
    PS: I agree with the comment above about your darling Henry. Get that boy in the movies! You could use your iPhone to make his audition tape.

    • Becky, it certainly boggles the mind! This wasn’t the first time I’ve left it in the office. The first time it happened I drove all the way back to work which is 20 minutes away and picked it up, but I got stuck in so much traffic in the process. This time I decided it’s too much trouble to drive back. Besides, I needed to teach myself a lesson. Maybe from now on, I’ll be more careful. Though I do like your idea of turning off the cell phone for a day. Maybe then we’d all be forced to live in the moment and interact with the people in front of us. Hmm…

  10. So funny Monica! However, it is amazing how a piece of equipment that only 10 years ago we thought we could live without, now has become attached to our body so much so that we are lost without it!

    • I know, Susan. I have no idea how I made it this far in my life without a cell all those years before it was invented. Sheesh. Now, all I need is a chain big enough so that I can wear my phone around my neck and never again leave it behind. 🙂

  11. What a wild imagination you have 😀 Glad you made it safely through the night without your cellphone. PS – Henry is just gorgeous. I used to have a Cavalier King Charles and he was one of the most awesome dogs I ever knew.

    • I survived, but barely, thank you very much. Please don’t tell Henry that he’s the most awesome dog. While it may be true (and I agree about his breed!), this fellow has a big enough head already, I kid you not! 😉

  12. Monica, your post yet again made me laugh out loud!!!

    How do we manage without our mobile phone…..

    My Blackberry has my world on it, my emails, my appointments, my general diary, business web addresses. The list just goes on.

    I carry mine everywhere I even put it in my pocket when I walk downstairs to the kitchen to make a drink or a snack. We have indeed become a slave to our cellphones.

    But having said that I think I am more a slave to my iPad, I even read the news on it when having breakfast and play games on it when I am having dull none productive periods, whether the none production is due to playing the games or not I won’t go into!!!

    I can remember years ago not having a landline when they were not that common and walking a mile or so to a phone box and joining the queue to use it.

    Henry had the right idea and just went to sleep, it’s a dogs life!!!!!!

  13. Monica, I am in fits of laughter as always. Just the thought of you driving to work ever so slowly, much to the irritation of other drivers makes me giggle incessantly. I love the photo of Henry wrapped in a blanket looking royally miffed. Um, I have left my phone at home when I most need it, driving to places unknown and trying to remember directions. I have also left it charging at home and gone many many miles, realizing I can’t call my husband in an emergency because he is out of town, I have the girls with me, it’s late at night after basketball practice, what if I have a flat tire? What if I break down? What if… oh my word I have had a plague of the what ifs and imagined the worst disasters – not fun at all 🙂

    • Thanks, MM. You are ever so sweet. Henry is pleased you like his photo. He says he wouldn’t expect any less, as he believes he makes a rather fetching model.

      Glad you can relate and understand my dilemma. Not having the lifeline handy is ghastly. 😉

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